Dancing in the Dark - It's getting emotional

Hi there, my fellow Spirit. I'm glad you're back, again. Thank you for your interest in my articles and your openness to learn new things, different approaches to deal with your struggles, and other ways of being. How're you, today? How do you feel? Your first response is probably something like, "Good, and you?" But is it actually true?

Do you really feel good or was your answer just a quick, unconscious response? Something you've been conditioned to reply, every time you're getting asked those questions? It's important how you feel. Why? Because your emotions shape your reality. They're energy in motion, powerful forces you're innately using to create and manifest, without even knowing, probably. The question is, does the reality you're creating reflect your true self? Is it in alignment with your soul's mission, or not? How do you feel about it?

This is probably a good time to take a closer look at the emotional spectrum we're dealing with here, and the consequences it has, if you don't pay enough attention to how you actually feel. Let's start from the beginning then. Emotions and feelings, both expressions are used interchangeably, yet they're totally different. First in line are the emotions. They're your body's rapid-fire response system, instant reactions to a stimulus. Metaphorically speaking, emotions are your internal smoke detector, instantly alerting you to danger.

Feelings are up next. They're personal interpretations of those stimuli, the story your mind tells about the situation. Staying with our fire example, feelings are what your mind thinks of the alarm bells going off. Since they have their origin in your mind, you might still feel them after several hours or days have past. Or, they show up out of the blue, months or even years later, especially if not dealt with, appropriately. Why? Because your mind's interpretation, including the corresponding thoughts, beliefs, and feelings, is quickly being transferred to your subconscious mind, where they stay until you decide to face and work with them.

Let me give you an example. Picture a big dog running straight at you. Your body reacts instantly - heart racing, palms sweating, muscles tensing. That's fear, your body's emotional response, kicking in. And your feeling? It depends. Are you scared of dogs? Then you might feel terrified. Are you a dog lover? Then you're probably excited. Same emotion, different feeling.

"Why does it even matter?," you might wonder. Being able to separate the feeling from the emotion gives you control. It puts you straight into the driver seat, enabling you to intentionally choose which direction you want your life path to take. And while you can't control your body's emotional response to a certain situation, you definitely have a say in the feelings that follow.

For starters, you can quickly detach yourself from your feelings, just as you do with your ever-flowing stream of thoughts. An alternative would be to re-frame them, which is a fairly easy method, as it only deals with your conscious mind and its interpretation of the situation in real-time. That increased heart rate right before a date? Instead of interpreting it as fear of rejection or embarrassment, try to see it as excitement because your body is just preparing itself for something wonderful and special. As long as you're able to re-frame the feeling into something pleasant, uplifting, and helpful, you're good to go.

It gets a bit more complicated if the feeling you're experiencing has already been linked to a certain belief and stored away on your internal "hard-drive," a.k.a. your subconscious mind, though. If you want to deal with this particular feeling, you also have to investigate the underlying belief connected to it. Reprogram or release the belief, and the feeling will dissolve, as well. If you want to learn how to do this, I'd suggest you read my previous article "Hey Space Cowboy, master your Mind" next. The process involves four steps and takes a bit of practice. Once you get the hang of it, it'll become second nature.

Lastly, there're your hidden feelings and suppressed emotions, which is a totally different ballgame. Those are buried very deep in your subconscious mind, hidden in an encrypted, "secure folder" with two-factor authentication. If you want to get access to them, you definitely have to know the password. We're speaking hidden fears, ingrained behavioral patterns, traumas, or painful childhood memories, here. Many people seek the help of professionals to deal with them in a wholesome and constructive way.

But, everybody is different. Some seek external help for advice, others wish to do it on their own. I'm one of the latter ones and my practices of choice to deal with my hidden feelings, surpressed emotions, and traumas are mindfulness and "shadow work." I also use mindfulness to manage any kind of negative emotions, in general, as those have a massive influence on both our physical and energy bodies.

Energy body? Yes, we all have one. As Spiritual Beings, we're pure energy, incarnating a physical form, our human body, to experience life in this realm. Hence, we have a subtle, non-physical, electromagnetic energy field, merging with and radiating around our physical body - our energy body. Part of this field (aura) are several energy centers (chakras) and pathways (meridians or nadis), which circulate life force energy (qi or prana). If the energy doesn't flow freely, your entire well-being is affected and you struggle - physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

But there's more to it. You being energy in an energy-based Universe, governed by fundamental principles in terms of said energy, makes it imperative for you to understand the complete scope of the impact your emotions are having on your life experience. Emotions, as we just found out, are what your body does as an response to a certain stimulus. Consequently, you can't control them, neither their occurrence, nor their duration. Yet, there's something important to keep in mind.

You're energy. Emotions are energy, too, ranging from vibrating on a very low frequency, like shame, fear, or anger, all the way up to the other side of the spectrum to joy, love, light, and peace - your natural State of Being. When you experience fear, your frequency is low. But, if you're joyful and at ease, your frequency is right on top of the scale. Why does it matter? Because you create your reality, your current and upcoming life experience, through the frequency you're vibrating on, in real-time, all the time.

How so? There's no separation, only Oneness. You're interconnected with all in existence through your energy body. Think of Oneness, or Universal Consciousness, as the ocean, while you're a wave in that ocean. This infinite energy field is in constant motion, vibrating at a unique, ever-changing frequency, and so are you.

Now, we're slowly zooming in on your life experience. Your thoughts, emotions, and feelings are also energy, and as such attract energy with the same frequency, like a magnet. You usually experience this as people, circumstances, and situations showing up in your life that match your energy frequency. If you're angry with someone, silently fuming like "Old Faithful" shortly before eruption, you might encounter a rude cashier or end up being flipped the finger while driving in traffic.

What goes out always returns, as your outer world reflects your inner State of Being. You being angry, will show up somewhere in your experience, especially if you're vibrating on this frequency for prolonged periods of time. So, what do you do? You change your frequency. You take a break, go the gym to blow of some steam, and take an ice-cold shower afterwards. You immediately feel better - and it shows. The lady at the reception desk, who ignored you on your way in, is now wishing you a great evening. And the service personal at the gas station, where you quickly fill up gas on your way home? All smiles and even cleaning your windows.

That's the influence your emotions, feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and actions have on your life experience. They're energy and you embody them 24/7. Doing so, you're continuously creating, shaping, and manifesting. Whether this process happens consciously and intentionally, or unconsciously and accidentally, is your choice to make. It'd better be a wise one, though. Your soul's mission and your well-being, depend on it.

That's all? Nope. Let me take it up a notch, here. Other people are energy, too. They're embodying all kinds of emotions, thus vibrating at various frequencies, too. Can you already feel what is about to come? We're all One. Just one infinite field of energy, which we're all part of. Our energy bodies are seemlessly intermingling with other energy bodies, like waves in the ocean. Consequently, other people's energy is transgressing into your energy body, and vice versa. Why does it matter? Because it has the potential to change your vibrational frequency inadvertently, for better or worse. Even though you might not feel it, it happens, all the time.

Your actions, feelings and beliefs, you can control. Just pay attention. Become aware of what you're doing and thinking. Not only that, own them. Step up to the plate and take responsibility by mastering your mind. Free up your mind-space and reprogram your beliefs and the corresponding feelings. With knowledge comes power. Power to pro-actively and intentionally act, create, and embody your human form. And that's exactly what your soul wants you to learn in this "training school."

That leaves us with the thoughts and emotions. Those, you cannot control, unfortunately. But you can detach from them. How? Mindfulness, a.k.a. present moment awareness. This practice is "a jack of all trades." Stress Management, anxiety issues, physical pain, body awareness, a rambunctious monkey mind, or an overwhelming avalanche of negative emotions threatening to bury you underneath them, mindfulness immediately comes to your rescue. I told you, that it's effective. In fact, it's my first line of defense to deal with any kind of "human struggle."

For those of you who haven't stumbled across this practice yet, let me try to put it in a nutshell for you. While becoming consciously aware in the present moment, you pay close attention to your thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surroundings without judgment. Just observing, cultivating your inner witness. In turn, you'll respond less automatically, yet more intentionally and calmly to life and it's ever-present challenges. Less stress, more focus, ease, and resilience, instead. Sounds great, don't you think?

Mindfulness involves various techniques, such as meditation, breathwork, body scan, and bringing conscious awareness to daily activities, such as cleaning, cooking, eating, and walking. By intentionally switching from "automatic mode" into "awareness mode," you're bringing your full attention to the here and now, which is all there is, anyway. The past is already gone. The future impossible to foresee. The present moment is where the magic happens. Why? Because it's right here and now that you're creating your upcoming life experience.

It's also the only space where you can connect with your Higher Self and tap into Universal Consciousness. By bringing awareness to the present moment with everything that's happening inside of you and all around you, you're setting yourself up for inspiration and guidance to come through. How? Your Higher Self and Spirit Guides are communicating with you all the time, you just have to become aware of it. The effortless process of finding the perfect parking spot at just the right moment, so you arrive to your appointment on time, that's divine help you might be receiving. The tingling sensation you're sensing right on top of your head while you stumble across a certain book at the bookstore, that might be very well your Higher Self, inspiring you to buy it because you might find something helpful in it.

Which brings us straight back to your emotions. The good thing with emotions is, they usually won't last long, only minutes, an hour maybe. Unless you resist them, pushing them away, burying them deep down, somewhere in an encrypted, "secure folder" with two-factor authentication. Once stored on your "hard-drive," retrieving them will be a challenge, especially if you forgot the password. The solution? Deal with them when they arise. Don't push them away. Be brave. Face them. Detach from them. Remember, it's just your body's rapid-fire response system kicking in. It's just a normal physical reaction you're experiencing.

Present moment awareness lets you notice the emotion arising and playing out right inside of you. Feeling it consciously, you get very familiar with its corresponding physical sensations. The same is true for your feelings, by the way. Mindfulness is always the first step to make. Sometimes it's even the only step you have to make, as is the case with your fleeting emotions.

In case of the deeply hidden and suppressed emotions and feelings, you know, the ones in your encrypted, "secure folder" with two-factor authentication, or your traumas, mindfulness alone might not be enough. For those special cases, "shadow work" might be worth a try. What's that? "Shadow work" also involves four steps but the process itself takes time, patience, utmost care, gentleness, and even more self love. Oftentimes, several sessions are necessary. Traumas just have a tendency to create scars for life, I know from experience.

The first step is to actively revisit the triggering situation in your mind. Close your eyes and carefully allow for those painful memories to surface on their own. Only go as far as you feel comfortable doing. Integrate mindfulness. Pay attention to yourself - body, mind, and soul. See and feel yourself in that situation, as if you're observing someone else, to create some emotional distance.

Next, you allow the situation to unfold, naturally inside of you. It may help, if you gently guide your focus to different areas, as to not get overwhelmed. Pay attention to your emotions first. What's your body's response to your memory coming up? To ease up the tension, focus on your breath for a while, before bringing it to your thoughts. What do you think right now? Do you notice an underlying belief? Any feelings? Just remember, feelings are just your mind's narrative of the story, of the memory you're currently revisiting.

Can you separate the emotion from the feeling involved? Both are physical sensations you can perceive, but one has a subjective tone, a fearful, anxious, frightened, or maybe angry voice to it. That's the feeling. The third step is all about feeling, the activity I mean. How does it feel reliving the memory? Always pay close attention to yourself. Stop the process if it gets too much. Your well-being should always be your no. 1 priority. If you feel comfortable staying with your emotions, feelings, and the memory itself for a little longer, try to relax your muscles a bit. Usually, we quickly tense up, whenever we're encountering something that activates our sympathetic nervous system, and with it our "fight-or-flight" response.

Fortunately, you can influence your sympathetic nervous system and help it to calm down, quicker. Just take a few conscious breaths. Guide your awareness slowly to your jaw, your face, then to your hands, your back and neck, your belly, and lastly to your feet. If you notice any tensed muscles, try to lose them up a little. Ease into your position or posture. Once you involuntaryly have to jawn, or let out a soft sigh, that's your "rest and relaxation mode" kicking in. There's no need to rush or time urgency. You can take as much time as you feel you need to do this. You're already so brave and courageous. You can be really proud of yourself. I certainly am.

The fourth and last step is to accept your emotions and feelings just as they are. Allow them to stay, for however long there're staying. Don't fight or resist them. Doing so, you'll only increase their energy and with that their intensity and duration. I know, this is easier said than done. We all want to feel good, and you will. In fact, it's your soul's intention that you feel at ease and are in love with yourself and your life experience, despite the challenges. It just takes time to heal, emotionally. Shower yourself with lots of love. You're an infinite spring of it.

Your soul just wants you to realize your full potentiality and embody your true self. It wants you to create a wonderful life for yourself. A life that aligns with your soul's core values and allows you to evolve and transform into the beautiful, magnificent, and very powerful Spirit that you really are. However, for you to do so in the most efficient way possible, you have to know how to master your mind and manage your emotions and feelings, in the first place.

You're an "Energy Being," continuously emitting and receiving waves of energy on various vibrational frequencies, or wavelengths. Taking full responsibility for your own energy and learning how to change it intentionally, are probably two of the most important factors in your human life experience, as they enable you to create the life you came here to have in the first place. A life, that is in alignment with your soul's mission. A life, that is experienced with conscious awareness. A life, created with intention and not by default. Moving forward on your spiritual path to enlightenment, you're asked to fill your role with authenticity, integrity, responsibility, and self-awareness. How do you feel? Are you ready to take action?